Why change your phone now? The Lord thundered…. He looked just like he did in those comic books. Flowing white beard, kindly wrinkled face and a booming voice.
“ Lord,” I stuttered. “ I bought the Motorola V3i because it looked…. Well sexy” wondering at my choice of words. “ It had iTunes” I continued …”and Bluetooth, GPRS,1.3 MP camera, video recording and the works..”
“How long did you use it ? the Lord asked
“More than a year, lord” I said. “ I still think of it as a sleek tool, although every Gupta, Verma and Kapoor owns it nowadays “
The Lord nodded, not amused at my feeble attempt at humour
“Did you grow out of it?, The Lord asked
“ No Lord, I still love it. It all has to do with synchronization…”
“Synchronisation?” The Lord yelled…”with what?” He asked.
“With Microsoft outlook “, I said “ there was a time when I believed that I could do my bit to discourage global monopolies. I would use the free version of Lotus smartsuite address book which smartly sat on top of my screen and could be pulled down alphabet wise for easy viewing. But soon I realized that the dominance of Bill Gates over our lives is complete” I gulped, hoping that the Lord would take my cue and do something to the stranglehold of huge corporations on the daily grind of minions like me.
I continued “ I realized that it is with Microsoft outlook that my earlier Nokia 6600 synchronizes best. The phone was however too chunky and didn’t sit well in my pocket. That is why I switched to V3i. Moreover I change my PC in office rather frequently. They always come with Outlook preloaded. I have to install smart suite separately and transfer the data.I bought the Nokia 6600 for an indecent price which I refuse to discuss and owned it for almost 2 years. I transferred my address book, notes, calendar and everything from Smartsuite to Outlook with great difficulty and synchronized it with the Nokia 6600’s symbian software. The 6600 had great synchronization features with outlook although it is not a windows mobile phone. I refused to replace the chunky model for a long time for the simple reason that I had paid too much for it”
The Lord nodded. This was getting too much ,I thought. This is the great Lord himself. I thought I could discuss only metaphysical, lyrical, philosophical and whatever other stuff they write in scriptures featuring him. Like why fish don’t fly and why mountains kiss the sky…Here I am discussing the relative merits of mobile phone models with him. This is one cool guy. He is in sync with times.
“Why did you buy the V3i ?’ The Lord asked
“The Nokia 6600 was becoming the butt of every joke in the circles I move” I said. “At the age of 44, it is not the music listening and camera toting crowd I move with. I have hardly any use for the camera. I am a great music lover, I They are professionals who juggle with emails, appointments, tasks, stick it notes etc. So I graduated to the V3i after exchanging my 6600. I ”
“Didn’t I see you surreptitiously click the photograph of the actress in the airport lounge last week with your camera phone?” the Lord asked.
“Well” I fumbled sweating and looking around, glad that my twelve year old son is not listening in. I felt like kicking myself. This is the God you are talking to. I should have known better not to lie or talk crap.
“That was just to show my friends and wife that I saw her….sorry about that. But coming to why I was frustrated with the V3i was …..”
“Wait..” God said. “Didn’t you think that the design is cool?”
“Yes Lord. I still think it is slim snazzy and uber cool. I realized rather late that the mobile is a rather useless music player. Early on I saw the advantages of synchronizing it with my favourites playlist in the iPod with the V3i thus avoiding carrying the iPod on journeys. Soon I realized it wasn’t a smart idea. Listening to music on a three hour flight drains the battery so soon that there won’t be enough juice left to power it to call a taxi in Mumbai or to tell your friend that you will be late arriving. So I sort of stopped using it as an iTunes player. I needed that synchronization features with my address book, calendar, notes and to do items. The Motorola just don’t synchronize as well with the PC as the Nokia symbian software does.”
“Hmm… Continue..”
“So I just went and exchanged the V3i for the Nokia E 65 “
“What… E65?” The lord thundered. His voice was quivering I suspect,,
“I didn’t want to shell out big bucks for the N95 or the other 30K plus phones. Who knows, they may come for a song three weeks from now. Yeah I think E65 is the best deal for all of only 14K. Has Wifi,GPRS, EDGE, 2MP camera and the great Nokia symbian software that I love so…It works like a dream with the outlook. I can even go back to my favourite Lotus smart suite software if I want to. All in all it is future proof”
“You fool… that’s what you thought when you bought the 6600 also. There is no such thing as future proof. I couldn’t foresee the future when temptations first struck Adam & Eve. So they said wait for the iPhone. Now they say wait for the Google phone. The future has always been a mystery. Keep gazing at your 2.5” screen of your iPod, Mobile and other handy devices. The future would make them look silly. You would laugh at how you agonized for hours to buy them….”
Thus spake Lord with an air of finality and flew among misty while clouds into his abode in heaven. Meanwhile I am trying to catch that signal in my Nokia E 65.
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